At work with vodka

It's 10:30 maybe. I was just thinking about the ability to breathe underwater and how i'd like to have it and why i'd like to have and why it wouldn't work out for me.

Remember these two images: The Graduate where Dustin Hoffman is at the bottom of the swimming pool/Rushmore where Bill Murray is at the bottom of the swimming pool

There's an issue of Namor, The Sub Mariner where Namor is at the bottom of the swimming pool sulking and his cousin Namorita butts her head under the water to talk him out of it.

If i could breathe underwater i could get away from it all. I'd hole up in a sunken submarine and watch Spike TV. I could go somewhere only deep sea divers and frog men dare. I'd inhale my own tears. I could take a dump and not have to take a shower soon after. Diarhea would be a temporary tail. If i swam quick the trail would look like my guts falling out. I could see creatures that no one else has ever seen. I'd be scared shitless. I'd swim an inch at a time always ready to throw up at the shadow moving just two dark feet ahead. I could find the ruins of Atlantis. Corpses and corpses. Corpses and corpses. All those corpses swaying with the final knowledge that even utopias end. I could eat bloated mermaid hearts.

I drowned once and once is enough.

Bottle is Red Robins Talking

PAGE ONE

Panel One: six red birds flying in the sky.

Red bird one says: Go on. You can to do it. Go on.
Red bird two says: Is you is or is you ain't a baby, baby?
Red bird three says: Trust us. We'll catch you if we're lying.

Panel Two: [text] When father wasn't happy/He'd run off to the sea/ Emptying his eyes/ Of vanity and greed

Panel Three: Overhead shot - a man staring up

Panel Four: man pointing at birds. he is top of a building

Man says: You are fucking with me are you?
Red bird one: Fuck no, brother.
Red bird two: If we're fucking may we both crash like lovers.

Panel Five: Man jumps off side of building.

Red bird one: Oh shit! He actually did it.

PAGE TWO

Panel One: extreme closeup of the man's wide eyed face, upside down

Small inset panel: closeup of man confused

Panel Two: Man floating upside down

Man says: Whoa...............

Panel Three: Same as the last panel man floating upside down

Man finishes: .......I am fucking dope!
Man Says: What do i do know brother red birds?

Panel Four: Birds attacking and ripping man to shreds

All the red birds as one: THIS IS WHAT'S NEXT, AMODEO!

The End

short poem (written while John Vanderslice plays on the stereo)

No one, keep together, life is breezy
what happens when you save harmonica boy
out in the desert where no on is supposed to be

Keep together, life is breezy, no one
so they don't smell just one of us on this ship
because intimidation is lock inches from key

Life is breezy, no one, keep together
the bike is upside down snagged to your shoelace
when you land on your back it hits you in the face.